Survivors have hope and faith

For so many years some of us were taught to be silent and bury our pain. There are issues that have not been dealt with which we had to learn to block out.

We were too ashamed, too hurtful, too guilty to tell anyone. Too often we were taught the old attitude “kids should be seen but not heard,” “kids shouldn’t speak until spoken to.”

My understanding of my role as a child was that I was to obey and to be free for the taking, to remain silent while being exploited or touched, and to be exposed freely and not tell. I was to be used and be quiet.

With this type of behaviour going unnoticed or unreported, how was I to get the answers to the questions that I had? How was I to tell anyone that I was getting buried alive with pain and suffering? Who could I tell? Where could I start? How do I begin? Who would listen to me? Who would even believe me?

When I would start to ask questions, I would only be told not to talk this way.

In the Chesterfield Inlet school days, we were taught this song which I’m sure has remained and haunted many of us:

“Pack up your troubles and smile, smile, what’s the use of worrying, get back and smile, smile.”

Why then shouldn’t I feel confused, angry and ashamed and full of guilt with the hidden abuse that I endured as a child and forced to bury my own soul? Am I the only one feeling such things?

Maybe, maybe not! How would I have ever known?

Today we are the survivors of residential schools and have much more hope and faith than we ever did before. People are starting to open up and be listened to. People are talking to each other with the ghosts of our pasts taken out and faced head-on.

Today, we are working towards healthier communities, and thank you to so many understanding people who have listened to us. Also thank you that we have each other to talk to and support each other.

Levinia Brown
Rankin Inlet